Teach Students Work Ethic

In today's Elmore Thoughts, https://growingleaders.com/blog/seven-ideas-teach-students-work-ethic/ Dr. Elmore looks at students and the benefits of Work Ethic.  The end result we want is for the students to think you can achieve almost anything if you work hard enough. This reminds me of an old saying at the University of Michigan, What the Mind can Conceive and Believe, the Body can Achieve, and those who Stay will be Champions.

In a recent survey, 23% of parents ask their kids to do chores.  Dr. Elmore list four reasons why parents fail to expect chores from kids, but they all deal with that we feel we're not good parents if we stress them out with chores.

Then, there is a study from the University of Mississippi that state, "chores instilled in children the importance of contributing to their families and gave them a sense of empathy as adults.  Those who had done chores as young children were more likely to be well-adjusted to have better relationships with friends and family and to be more successful in their careers."  The study further states, "asking children to help with household chores starting at age 3 or 4 was instrumental in predicting the children's success in their mid-20s."

HOW PARENTS and TEACHERS can TEACH HEALTHY WORK ETHIC (Beyond Chores)

Dr. Elmore lists 7 items, four of them are: 1) Choose appropriate tasks, 2) Model a work ethic, 3) Offer payment, and 4) Talk about the benefits.   Follow the link above to read for explanations of these four items and the rest of the items that will help your child create some work ethic.

Balancing our impulses and our analysis is tough

This week Elmore Thursday Thoughts is about two extremes we must help students avoid.
http://growingleaders.com/blog/two-extremes-must-help-students-avoid/

Dr. Elmore starts off the article with a lot of scientific information about the "amygdala."  Which is summarized as good decisions are hard for adolescents because they don't have all the tools they need to make wise choices.

Dr. Elmore then talks about two case studies, Trevor and Carly (not their real names).  Trevor doesn't think too long before he makes a decision.  His past has assured him that if he makes a bad choice, his parents (or some adult) will swoop in and save him.  Carly on the other hand overthinks.  She weighs out every option, even paralyzed from choosing at all.  She likes to keep her options open because she is afraid to make a poor decision or to fail.  When she does make a decision, she doesn't enjoy it.  

What Can we Do?

For the Impulsive Student - We must Raise the stakes.

For the Analytical Student - We must lower the stakes.

Continue to read Dr. Elmore's blog to see how we can do that.

Bonus Thought: Studies show K-8 Model beneficial.

In this Bonus thought article, http://www.edweek.org/ew/articles/2016/10/05/shorter-school-grade-spans-linked-to-bullying.html  Education Week, a weekly paper I receive, had this article that talked about a recent study that found students that are in shorter grade spans are linked to more bullying among other issues.  Those other issues included math and reading achievement declines, absenteeism rising, and students feel less connected to the school.

This is why we love having a Preschool to 8th-grade option for our parents.  It gives them a place of community, a home away from home.  It is an interesting read that goes a little deeper than what I just summarized here.  We also want to thank you that you are part of our family.

Self Discipline and Willpower

Before we jump into our article for this week, I would like to share with you, our experience this past week for the LEA Convocation.  It was a blast.  There was fun, a lot of it too.  We got to be entertained by Joe Castillo http://sandstory.com/ A sand artist that took 2nd on America Got Talent.  We were also entertained by The Skit Guys https://skitguys.com/ A duo of comedians that perform short skits. Both sets of performers use their gifts that God has given them to help spread His word.  Other fun times were being able to talk and catch up with other Lutheran educators from around the world.  I do mean around the world too, one of my good friends is the Director of Operations in Hanoi, Vietnam http://www.concordiahanoi.org/ He has been out there for the last two years.  We were able to catch up with college classmates, individuals that used to teach and student teach at CTK, and lastly we were able to make new friends/acquaintances.

It wasn't all just fun and games, we learned a lot too.  The sectionals were magnificent and well done.  I don't think I heard a teacher say there were no sectionals for me.  We also had two main speakers.  Rev. Dr. John Nunes (originally from the Detroit area) who is the President of Concordia College New York talked about our Lutheran schools and how diverse our students are. Then the main speaker was Dr. Tim Elmore.  He talked about adjusting our sails in the world of education.  Not that we much change WHAT we teach, but we must change HOW we teach if we want to reach our students.

So, this leads to this week's article from Tim about Building Self Discipline and Willpower
http://growingleaders.com/blog/four-steps-build-self-discipline-willpower-students/

Tim starts out the article quoting (as he often does) a study where the University of Pennsylvania set out to measure self-discipline. Their results accurately predicted student's final grades, class attendance, and standardized test scores.  "Self-discipline accounted for more than twice as much impact as IQ did..."  What a bold statement. What does this mean? Students at CTK can succeed a lot more by just working on those self-discipline / willpower skills.  In my running, I know will power has a lot to do with how good I will do in a race or training.  During my long runs (6 to 10+ miles) there are many factors that make me want to just stop.  It takes willpower to plow through these workouts and races where walking or quitting would be so much easier.

Dr. Elmore does give us four steps to help us build our self-discipline / willpower skills  He also made it a game in a sort of way.  1st Step "DO IT IF YOU HATE IT"  In this game Tim suggest we choose one activity we absolutely loath and then purposefully make it a daily act.  For your child, that may be making their bed or put their clothes away EVERY DAY!  The 2nd step goes with the 1st step "ACCOUNTABILITY BUILDS RESILIENCY"  This is where you pair up with a buddy to keep you accountable.  There are many Biblical principles to this step too.  I have been part of accountability Bible studies in the past.  We checked in with our partner to make sure they were doing what they said they were doing.  Tim concludes this step with these words of truth, "we all do better when we are watched, and we all do better when we are encouraged."  Read the rest of the article for the last two steps.

Have a Blessed Day too!

Seven Different Mentors Your Students Need

I truly hope you are enjoying these weekly Thursday Elmore Thoughts.  It is kinda fitting writing about an article on Mentors, written by someone who is my mentor.  It is important to me, even today, to stay in touch with my mentors.  Which leads to these questions;

1. Do you have a mentor?
2. Does your child have a mentor?

Dr. Elmore explains the reason why our kids should have a mentor and the different types of mentors. http://growingleaders.com/blog/seven-different-mentors-students-need/ Tim has found over the years that majority of students say they desire to have a mentor in their life.  That they want someone they could call and bounce a question off of.  Someone that is slow to judge but quick to offer hope.  For a 1st grade student, that mentor may be just you right now.

Gallup released findings from one of their surveys where they found that "Where you went to college" is not as important in your life, as an adult, than, "how you went to college"  What do they mean?  Tim quotes Inside Higher Ed to saying the two key concepts were, "Feeling supported and having deep learning experiences." Tim, later on, states that students who succeeded were the ones who said, "I had a professor or a staff member who built a relationship with me and offered counsel during my tough semesters or uncertain days." If you change the words from professor to teacher and semester to quarters then I hope you could be talking about CTK.  The teachers and I are working on looking at our Mission, Vision, Commitment, and Goals during faculty meetings. I would love to hear a student say we are their mentors.  

When it comes to the seven different type of mentors Tim asks us to examine them for two reasons; 1) To determine which kind we most need in our life, and 2) To determine which kind we are best suited to be for someone else.  Please read the article and look over the seven kinds of mentors.  Discuss with your children the importance to have mentors and start identifying some in their lives. 

Bonus Thought: Fixate Our Eyes

This is a bonus thought for the week.  Even though we will not have school on Thursday, An Elmore Thought Article will still be published.

The Lutheran school Principals across Michigan are reading the book, "Switch" from Chip and Dan Heath together.  In our regional meetings, we discuss a chapter at a time.  During my read for my upcoming meeting today, a section stood out to me.  It stood out as it is related to some of these Elmore Thoughts we been reading about too. Especially the focus on Growth part.

In this book, the section is talking about how as humans we focus on the bad before the good or that "bad is stronger than good."  To illustrate this point, the authors shared this story with us, as a father, I find I do this too;

"Your child comes home one day with her report card. She got one A, four B's, and one F. Where will you spend your time as a parent?"

Nearly all parents will tend to fixate on that F.  We will even rationalize that thought as; Something seems broken - we should fix it.  Let's get her a tutor.  Or maybe she should be punished - she's grounded until that grade recovers. I know I been there, rarely do we think or say;  Honey, you made an 'A' in this one class.  You must really have strength in this subject.  How can we build on that?

The chapter continues to talk about trying to realign our thinking.  Fixating our eyes on the positive.  As Christians, we are to Fixate our Eyes on the Lord.  Imagine the world in which you experienced a rush of gratitude every single time you flipped a light switch and the room lit up.  For us, husbands, imagine when we forgot our wife's birthday instead of going to the dog house she says, "For thirteen of the last fourteen years you remember my birthday! That's wonderful!"  Hard to imagine, isn't it.  But, it is possible.  I will leave you with this final thought and question to answer for yourself, "What is the ratio of the time you spend solving problems to the time you spend scaling success?"  Fixate your Eyes on the Future, not the past.  Be a solution based thinker,

I hope everyone has a great long weekend!

Empathy has gone AWOL!

In this week's Elmore Thursday Thoughts, we are looking at an article that moves students from Apathy to Empathy.  Tim started the article talking about his sightings on a college campus.  He states that while observing students he saw them engaged, but not the way we would like.  The students were more emotional than logical, more talking than listening, trying to catch the other person saying something incorrectly than finding a place of compromise.  Sadly, neither student, in this case, wanted to improve themselves, they just wanted to prove themselves were right.

http://growingleaders.com/blog/four-essentials-move-students-apathy-empathy/ 

Thanks to Google, let's first define each keyword:

Apathy: lack of interest, enthusiasm, or concern

Empathy: the ability to understand and share the feelings of another.

Tim then shocked me by giving the statistic that over the last 15 years there's been a drop of 40 percent in empathy among U.S. college students. In today's technological world we see this as cyber-bullying, emotional arguments, and social media feuds.  Mr. Elmore states that part of maturation (promoting to each grade) is understanding and caring for the world beyond our own.  That is why at CTK we make it a priority to serve others.

Tim then gives us four ingredients that move students from apathy to empathy.  His first  ingredient is entitled: Margin.  This is related to the other article where we need to focus on fewer activities rather than more.  Tim is quoted at saying, "if our schedules are absolutely jammed, our brains are fully stimulated."  He later gives a suggestion to plan "boredom time" into your day.

Please continue to read the article for three more ingredients that move students from apathy to empathy.  Please comment on ideas on how we can help our students too.


Don't forget to join me the First Thursday of each Month from 8:30 to 9:30am in the West Gallery for up-to-date information on where CTK is at in regrades to selling Trenton road and what the future holds.

STOP: Turn Around

Maybe you have seen this picture that has been going around Social Media this late summer early fall. I don't know how many times it came across my feed. In this week's Elmore's Thursday Thoughts, you will be able to read his thoughts and how it can apply to your children and our students.

 http://growingleaders.com/blog/one-sign-every-school-needs-to-hang-up/

Tim finished the article with a list of Stop and Starts for us to follow.

It is worthy to note that this sign is posted on a Catholic High School that is for boys only.  I don't think it changes the concepts of Tim's thought, though.

When I taught third grade at our back to school night, I would always remind the parents that they will hear the "F" word.  "FORGOT."  Almost daily I would have one student tell me they forgot this or forgot that.  Parent's will come into my class saying, Johnny (made up name) forgot his homework, I will bring it up later.  I always told them, it is ok.  They can forget.  They can learn what it means to forget and not get saved.  It was tough, tougher on the parents than the kids, though.  As this article mentions they figure it out, they problem solved.  My third graders did too.  Sometimes they had to live the decision of not having what they needed, but they survived and were better for it.

The Forgot didn't just end at third grade when I was principal of a high school, we too had students forget things.  They learned to be responsible and to problem solved.

When I was reading Tim's logic behind good leadership, I was a little defensive.  I don't want to see my boys hurting or  failing.  I want to protect them all the time, maybe that is why I like being a principal, I can watch them throughout the day.  What I was really doing, though, was not thinking long term.  What will happen when I am no longer around, I can't give them a dollar for this or that at any second, or even run out to get them lunch.  There will be a day where they are no longer depending on me, and that is scary.  What is scarier is if when they do leave and they don't know how to handle it, because they are depending on my wife and me to solve their problems.  As much as I love them being around the house now, I don't think I want them to be around the house that much when they are 30,40,or even 50 (unless they are bringing grandkids over).

Let's work together Parent and School to help to give your children the resources they need so that they are prepared to take on anything, short term but also long term.  Equip them so they know they are capable of being the adult we want them to become.

Change our Focus!

Since last week I shared with you a Tim Elmore Post, I thought why not make this a regular thing.  So this week I want to share this article from Tim that we must change our focus to be better parents, but also better Teachers.  As mentioned in the last post, Mrs. Konkel uses a lot of Tim's stuff.  Mrs. Konkel shared this article with us during one of our staff devotions.

http://growingleaders.com/blog/five-destructive-parenting-habits-must-replace/

Tim talks about 5 habits that we must change to make "all the difference in the world" for the students/children.  Tim starts out with a funny realization of parenthood.  "First child eats dirt. Parent calls the doctor immediately.  The second child eats dirt. Parent cleans out his mouth.  The third child eats dirt. Parents wonder if they really need to feed him lunch.  As a parent myself, I find this to be awkwardly true between my oldest and my youngest.

I will let you read the article itself, as Tim does a great job defining each habit and how to change it and an example of each.  What resonates with school the most is probably the 2nd and 3rd habit. In reality, they are all good and applicable.

The second habit Tim discusses is changing from a focus on grades to a focus on growth.  I could not agree more as an educator.  Although as a father, I don't always remember this.  This is why at CTK we have invested in the NWEA tests.  By taking it in the Fall and Spring we are able to see the growth of the students.  Although scores are important and Tim talks about that, but we ask the question did the student grow and with NWEA it tells us about how much the child is expected to grow.  If they don't meet that goal, then we can ask why.  That "why question" is very important in my opinion.  Tim mentions when we focus on that one bad grade compared to the 10 good grades, we can create undo stress upon our student/child.

The third habit is replacing our clutter schedules with simplicity.  I am guilty of this myself, we want our children to be involved in a lot, and be good at everything.  Tim talks about the importance that maybe we need to focus on one event at a time.  This isn't just for children, though, I can relate this to myself even.  I often find that I feel that I am burning my own candle from both ends.  I hate saying no to people when they are in need or need help or someone to take care of items.  This can be very overwhelming even for myself.  I look at my schedule for today, Wake up early, be at school by 7am. School to 3.  Drive to a soccer game.  Find or make dinner.  Make sure my sons' homework is completed. Do my doctoral school homework.  Go for a walk or run.  I am sure there will be two or three other things I will have to do that I am not even thinking about at this time.  I could be better at cutting things out of my life.

I am interested though through these posts to get feedback and having conversations.  Please feel free to post comments and respond to other comments.  We are here to grow together.

The Power of Failure

I have been bad about keeping this up-to-date, and I apologize for that. Rather it is videos of myself speaking, sharing links (as I will be today), or writing my own articles, I will do a better job for you. Since I failed at this, I thought it would be good to share an article about the Power of Failure, and ironically it appeared today in my Memories on Facebook that I shared this same article a few years ago.

  http://growingleaders.com/blog/failure-can-kids-best-friend/

First, this article comes from Tim Elmore.  Tim Elmore is one of my mentors.  He writes a lot about how to train up leaders and how to be a better leader and parent.  Tim is a Christian man that runs his own non-profit.  I have personally heard Tim speak many times in the past and lucky enough that all the teachers get to hear him this October during our Professional Development days. Mrs. Konkel uses Tim's books,  "Habitudes" for development building in the middle school.

Moving on to the article itself.  Tim challenges to let our kids take risks and even fail now so that they may not fail later.  He uses the illustration that letting a child ride their bike around a busy street as a child, will help them to learn and respect the road and cars so when they are behind the wheel they understand better.  He goes on to share the story of Bill Gates and how he failed at school and eventually dropped out of College.

In conclusion, to make it personal, as an athlete, I often learn more about myself and the sport when I fail or lose.  Two of my favorite wrestlers (not WWE, but actual wrestling) are Dan Gable and Cael Sanderson.  Although generations divide these two, there are very similar in their dominance in the sport.  They both even went to the same University, Iowa State.  Dan Gable since an early age was a successful wrestler, in fact, heading into his last match of his college career he was undefeated, never lost.  He failed to win his last College match.  Did that deter him, of course, he was upset, but he didn't let it stop him.  He went on to the Olympic games in Munich winning Gold while not giving up a single point.  Something that is remarkable.  Cael found a little more success than Dan in his wrestling days as he was undefeated including every college match.  When it came to international matches, he wasn't as successful and failed to make the Olympic team in 2000.  He didn't let that stop him as he went on to win the Gold in 2004 in Athens.  Both Dan and Cael moved onto coaching and both have multi-NCAA championships as a coach.

Don't be afraid to let your child fail a little.  When they do, talk about it and talk about why and how they could be better prepared for the next time they have a similar task. May God bless your day!